Who doesn't have to work peak?

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

I have a co-worker (married) who recently became the father of twins with a former OMS clerk (not his wife). He took 3 weeks off to be with her and the babies (and consult with a divorce lawyer).

I jokingly teased him that Hallmark doesn't make a card for his situation.

 

[IVE GOTTA PACKAGE 4U]

In Canada, both spouses can take up to 6 months of the 1st year at 80% of their salary. A friend of mine used to manage a Cargill grain buying facility in Canada and he saw it as a positive for the family and a positive for the work force. He had to have additional staff to cover family leaves, so it was good for employment policy. Plus, he said that employees would come back to work, ready to work. They had far fewer sick calls, as many couples would split their leave so that both were not at work until the newborn was 11 months old.

FMLA is a positive on so many fronts and the US is a world leader for how little time off they give new parents.

If we could get 6 months paid leave here in the USA .....................................I would have about 12 kids.......lol

 

[MAKAVELI]

You seem to have a problem with people expressing their personal opinions.

If this forum permitted it I would love to give my personal opinion of you.

No problem here bro. You really shouldn't take postings on here so personal. You stated your opinion and I stated mine. Not much else to it unless you make it an issue.

 

[barnyard]

If we could get 6 months paid leave here in the USA .....................................I would have about 12 kids.......lol

Not me.

2 was the perfect number and no policy would have changed that. I was a stay at home dad and I think my wife would have liked to have stayed home longer, but she had a better paying job and we could not afford it.

 

[cachsux]

So your co-workers should get screwed because you want to stay home and play Daddy?

My co-workers are equally welcome to have children of their own and take leave under the law as they wish. If those who are working at that time feel screwed then forget them. They aren't the ones I go home to every day. They won't be the ones at my kids side when they need it. They won't be at my grave in the end. When my daughter was born in 94 aside from the four weeks I took as FMLA I never saw her awake from Mon-Fri while I worked package. Was it worth it to take that time to me, yes. Am I concerned how my co-workers felt about it, not in the least.

Everyones welcome to their priorities.

As I said, if the person who wrote this is the birth mother then by all means stay home and take care of yourself and the baby. If the person is the father then IMO two weeks should be sufficient and then get your butt back to work.



Both of my kids were born while I was on active duty and she was a RN working full-time. I forget how much time we were given but after two weeks she said I was driving her crazy and begged me to go back to "work". (I used the quotes because the work that I did while in the service paled in comparison to the work that I now do.) Her parents flew down to help out with every new grandchild so, really, I got in the way. After 4 weeks she was going stir crazy and couldn't wait to get back to work.



I know that the program provides for up to 12 weeks of unpaid leave but if the birth mother has a support network in place is there really any need for the father to stay home other than an excuse to miss Peak?

You were asked and never replied. Our spouses should only plan on having children when it's convenient for the company?

 

[doolittle95]

So your co-workers should get screwed because you want to stay home and play Daddy?

As I said, if the person who wrote this is the birth mother then by all means stay home and take care of yourself and the baby. If the person is the father then IMO two weeks should be sufficient and then get your butt back to work.

Both of my kids were born while I was on active duty and she was a RN working full-time. I forget how much time we were given but after two weeks she said I was driving her crazy and begged me to go back to "work". (I used the quotes because the work that I did while in the service paled in comparison to the work that I now do.) Her parents flew down to help out with every new grandchild so, really, I got in the way. After 4 weeks she was going stir crazy and couldn't wait to get back to work.

I know that the program provides for up to 6.5 weeks of unpaid leave but if the birth mother has a support network in place is there really any need for the father to stay home other than an excuse to miss Peak?

Excuse to miss peak? Really? Take aadvantage of our benefits get some therapy, parenting classes...something. your wife is sick of you after 4 weeks?.....u got in the way?...she cant wait to get back to freaking nursing job? Unbelievable!! Get some perspective somewhere dammit...

every new father should spend as much time as possible with their wife and child...its about family and precious moments
that are elusive enough as it is. Take every minute u can.life is too short. That cardboard will get delivered regardless I'll happily take some extra stops for anyone on fmla. Maybe u should too brother dave.

 

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

Excuse to miss peak? Really? Take aadvantage of our benefits get some therapy, parenting classes...something. your wife is sick of you after 4 weeks?.....u got in the way?...she cant wait to get back to freaking nursing job? Unbelievable!! Get some perspective somewhere dammit...

every new father should spend as much time as possible with their wife and child...its about family and precious moments
that are elusive enough as it is. Take every minute u can.life is too short. That cardboard will get delivered regardless I'll happily take some extra stops for anyone on fmla. Maybe u should too brother dave.

First of all, we are not brothers. Secondly, both of my children are college graduates, my son is going for his MBA and neither have had more than minor scrapes with the law, so I think your questioning of my parenting skills is unwarranted. Third, she was tired of me after two weeks, not four. She had her parents there and while she certainly appreciated the time that I took off we both agreed that it was time for me to go back to work. She was equally ready to go back after just four weeks----what can I say, she loved her job and we had the good fortune of an awesome day care provider.

Maybe it's just me (and it sure sounds that way) but I could never take 12 weeks of unpaid leave to play Daddy.

 

[barnyard]

Third, she was tired of me after two weeks, not four.

I totally get that.

 

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

I totally get that.

I have a hard time sitting still and feel guilty if I am not doing something. She was recovering from the 12 hours of labor, adjusting to life with a newborn, playing hostess to Mommy and Daddy and having to deal with me going stir crazy. Sending me back to work gave her one less thing to worry about.

 

[Ouch]

First of all, we are not brothers. Secondly, both of my children are college graduates, my son is going for his MBA and neither have had more than minor scrapes with the law, so I think your questioning of my parenting skills is unwarranted. Third, she was tired of me after two weeks, not four. She had her parents there and while she certainly appreciated the time that I took off we both agreed that it was time for me to go back to work. She was equally ready to go back after just four weeks----what can I say, she loved her job and we had the good fortune of an awesome day care provider.

Maybe it's just me (and it sure sounds that way) but I could never take 12 weeks of unpaid leave to play Daddy.

So whats your saying is you PLAY daddy? Hummm, interesting.

 

[doolittle95]

Well it sounds like things are working out, congratulations. Seems like this thread contains several unwarranted opinions.

 

[MAKAVELI]

Maybe it's just me (and it sure sounds that way) but I could never take 12 weeks of unpaid leave to play Daddy.

Yea, I think it's just you. And I don't know what you mean by " playing daddy". Both parents have an equal responsibility and influence in a child's life. No just " playing daddy" here.

 

[cachsux]

1) Barnyard, my wording was for emphasis and not directed towards Dave so pull your panties out of your tenders and let the posts alone or refer them to Cheryl.

2)Dave, You were entitled to what you saw fit. If the other poster sees fit to take more that's his business. As I said, those who feel screwed can go take a flying flip (better barnyard?) and pray that they never have the need. I've had FMLA since my youngest was born with his disability 6 years ago. In 2013 I've taken 11 FMLA day throughout the year. As far as feeling screwed, that's less by far than the little brown nosers have wrangled off with their under table dealings.

 

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

Yea, I think it's just you. And I don't know what you mean by " playing daddy". Both parents have an equal responsibility and influence in a child's life. No just " playing daddy" here.

The ideal would be to be in a financial situation to where one or the other would be able to stay home and be a full-time parent; sadly, that is not the reality of today's world nor was it the reality when my children were born.

I love my children and part of that love is being able to provide for them both emotionally and financially. The emotional part has not always come easy for me. My father was very cold and distant. My parenting skills were basically learned on the job. The financial part was always easier for me and perhaps that is why I was ready to go back to work after just two weeks.

My ex's family is much more open and loving than mine was. They say "I love you" when someone leaves the room and saying "goodbye" can be a 20 minute ordeal.

Although I don't express it nearly as often as I should my children both know that I love them very much.

 

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

Well it sounds like things are working out, congratulations. Seems like this thread contains several unwarranted opinions.

So now you are the opinion police?

 

[UpstateNYUPSer(Ret)]

1) Barnyard, my wording was for emphasis and not directed towards Dave so pull your panties out of your tenders and let the posts alone or refer them to Cheryl.

2)Dave, You were entitled to what you saw fit. If the other poster sees fit to take more that's his business. As I said, those who feel screwed can go take a flying flip (better barnyard?) and pray that they never have the need. I've had FMLA since my youngest was born with his disability 6 years ago. In 2013 I've taken 11 FMLA day throughout the year. As far as feeling screwed, that's less by far than the little brown nosers have wrangled off with their under table dealings.

I took no offense and appreciate your position on this subject.

 

[TooTechie]

SuperDave, you say he's not your brother...so you've withdrawn from the union? Why would you care if someone is taking an unpaid leave of absence? I too only took two weeks when my children were born but that was due to financial limitations.

Bottom line is having an opinion is different from trying to stuff it down everyone's throat. Set a personal goal,"I will not tell others what they should or should not be doing" as they don't live in the BoG.

 

[upschuck]

I have a co-worker (married) who recently became the father of twins with a former OMS clerk (not his wife). He took 3 weeks off to be with her and the babies (and consult with a divorce lawyer).

I jokingly teased him that Hallmark doesn't make a card for his situation.

I thought they made cards for every occasion.

 

[upschuck]

The ideal would be to be in a financial situation to where one or the other would be able to stay home and be a full-time parent; sadly, that is not the reality of today's world nor was it the reality when my children were born.

I love my children and part of that love is being able to provide for them both emotionally and financially. The emotional part has not always come easy for me. My father was very cold and distant. My parenting skills were basically learned on the job. The financial part was always easier for me and perhaps that is why I was ready to go back to work after just two weeks.

My ex's family is much more open and loving than mine was. They say "I love you" when someone leaves the room and saying "goodbye" can be a 20 minute ordeal.

Although I don't express it nearly as often as I should my children both know that I love them very much.

While I agree with most of what you said, a UPS driver makes well more than enough for that ideal situation that you talk about.

 

[bleedinbrown58]

SuperDave, you say he's not your brother...so you've withdrawn from the union? Why would you care if someone is taking an unpaid leave of absence? I too only took two weeks when my children were born but that was due to financial limitations.

Bottom line is having an opinion is different from trying to stuff it down everyone's throat. Set a personal goal,"I will not tell others what they should or should not be doing" as they don't live in the BoG.

What is the BoG?