Teamsters and UPS reach tentative agreement

Discussion in 'UPS Discussions' started by Pip, Apr 1, 2007.

  1. Pip

    Pip New Member

    Tentative agreement between UPS and Teamsters reached.

    Highlights of contract:

    1)90% of parttimers employeed before August 30th, 2006 are to be given fulltime status and benefits based of a 40 hour work week. All wages will coincide with driver wage scales retroactive to hire date.

    2) 40,000 new fulltime jobs to be created over the length of the new contract.

    3) Any hours over 8.5 will be optional at the discretion of the package car drivers.

    4)Teamsters will hand over control of the Pension funds to APWA, retroactive to january 1, 1981.

    5) PCM's will be updated to allow drivers to control content of mistakes made by management on a daily basis.

    6) 401k retirement funds will have an 8% company match with anything over 8% will then cally .5% match thereafter, retroactive back to August 30th, 1992

    7) Graduated wage scales will be as follows for the length of the contract

    August 30th 2007 $1.00 per hour increase + COLA
    August 30th 2008 $1.00 per hour increase + COLA
    August 30th 2009 $1.50 per hour increase + COLA
    August 30th 2010 $2.00 per hour increase + COLA
    August 30th 2011 $2.50 per hour increase + COLA

    8)Christmas Bonus turkeys will be discontinued, in exchange for $1000 for each year of service, retroactive to hire date.

    To see further information regarding contract agreements April Fool's Day Gallery
    Last edited: Apr 1, 2007
  2. tommyl62

    tommyl62 michigan metro detroit

    Very Funny
  3. haha should have expected this
  4. scratch

    scratch Least Best Moderator Staff Member

    Good one Pip. If that were to be our real contract, UPS would go out of business in no time. I especially liked #8, about getting $1000 for each year of service instead of a Turkey. I started in 1975, I could pay cash for a new car every year with $32,000.
  5. 30andout

    30andout New Member

    HaHaHA yet another great comic is born.
  6. disneyworld

    disneyworld Active Member

    Didn't have to get to the bottom to know it was BS.
  7. jlphotog

    jlphotog Member

    Although I was saying BS to most of it, I have to admit, I got got.:thumbup1:

    BLACKBOX Life is a Highway...

    How many of us wish #3 was not a pipe dream..
  9. satellitedriver

    satellitedriver Moderator

    Is there any way you could become one of the negotiators? If just one of your ideas came true you would earn my undying respect.
    Great Post.
  10. wyobill

    wyobill New Member

    an 8.5 plan day takes me 9.5 to 10, unless I want to skip my lunch. Id settle for a fair time allocation
  11. AznDiablo

    AznDiablo Senior Member

    #2 and #3 would work well together. Excessive overtime being optional depending on the driver, which would mean they would have to open up more full time jobs in package driving. They should take the the wage scale on this seriously though. The Last one would be nice and be out of a job haha
  12. Sammie

    Sammie Well-Known Member

    "But that Christmas Cornish hen is always the highlight of our family holiday meal!" (They do diminish in size every year..)

    This was always my comment every Christmas and my mgr always told me what a smart a** I was. We walked out of the building together one night to pick up our turkeys and at the trailer where they're handed out, and saw a driver toss his right back, saying they could keep their d***** little Cornish hen. Arr arr...
  13. p-dale parts man

    p-dale parts man New Member

    You must think you're a stand up comic. Anybody that knows UPS business should know that you can't stay in business for 100 years with an attituide like this.
  14. Pip

    Pip New Member

    I appoligize for coming across as a comic or such. The post was only meant as a light hearted April fools day thing. Nothing more nothing less. Thats why I had the link at the bottom for an April Fools website. I'll be more careful in the future.:)
  15. abes

    abes abes

    I thought it was great pip,p dale must not have a sense of humor,gotta lighten up.Very funny.Had me thinking though,#3 & 8 are worth going for,ahhhhhhhhh I give my turkey away every year anyway.
  16. mittam

    mittam Member

    great post thought it was great! Need some laughs!
  17. moreluck

    moreluck golden ticket member were the first to do an April Fool's thing and you pulled everybody's leg......too bad some people can't see humor in anything. I thought you did a great job and appreciate the laugh.
  18. aspenleaf

    aspenleaf New Member

    This is a funny thread. Don't worry about those who don't like your humor and please don't be more careful in the future! We need more laughs. Everyone gets so stressed out and laughter helps to relieve the stress. :thumbup1:
  19. over9five

    over9five Moderator Staff Member

    "I'll be more careful in the future."

    Don't be. That was great!
  20. speeddemon

    speeddemon Guest

    Why not get that bonus? Mgt doesnt? Come on man!