Have you blown your horn today?

Discussion in 'Introductions and Welcomes' started by UPS Horn Genie, Aug 8, 2018.

  1. UPS Horn Genie

    UPS Horn Genie Toot toot! Have you blown your horn today?

    Greetings! I am new here.

    My name is UPS Horn Genie and I grant wishes. You may rub my bottle or blow your horn on route and I will appear and proceed to grant you wishes. The number of wishes is not specified and may be a fraction of a wish. While supplies last. Limited time offer.

    Be careful what you wish for!

    And remember: blow your horn daily!

    Toot toot!
     
  2. I wish for you to disappear
    ..
     
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  3. sailfish

    sailfish Duke of Douschebaggery

    Twice.

    Oops. Nevermind. Didn't read the whole title.
     
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  4. UPS Horn Genie

    UPS Horn Genie Toot toot! Have you blown your horn today?

    I didn't feel a rub or hear the toot! of a horn.

    Toot toot!
     
  5. sailfish

    sailfish Duke of Douschebaggery

    I think I like you. We're gonna get along just fine.
     
  6. UPS Horn Genie

    UPS Horn Genie Toot toot! Have you blown your horn today?

    That's the spirit, 'fish! Cheers to a long life and many delivery stops!

    Toot toot!
     
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  7. Don't make me :censored2:ing puke
    Geezus...
     
  8. BakerMayfield2018

    BakerMayfield2018 Fight the power.

    76E610F4-D1B4-4FBF-8D45-83144F0A1FE4.gif
     
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  9. sailfish

    sailfish Duke of Douschebaggery

    Well... Not so fast on the the delivery stops, there.
     
  10. over9five

    over9five Moderator Staff Member

    We are attracting the crazies lately, aren't we.....


    Toot toot
     
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  11. And we shouldn't let new members post a thread until they have 500 posts. Have fun with this crapola
     
  12. UPS Horn Genie

    UPS Horn Genie Toot toot! Have you blown your horn today?

    Most of my bottled friends and family are quite sane!

    I do have a crazy brother-in-law, however. He believes rubbing his own bottle from the inside will make himself appear. It doesn't work that way! I should call him sometime.

    Toot toot!
     
  13. sailfish

    sailfish Duke of Douschebaggery

    C'mon! At least this is original and entertaining.
     
  14. UPS Horn Genie

    UPS Horn Genie Toot toot! Have you blown your horn today?

    ORION ensures most go slower.

    Toot toot!
     
  15. sailfish

    sailfish Duke of Douschebaggery

    Fortunately I don't have to worry about that anymore.
     
  16. UPS Horn Genie

    UPS Horn Genie Toot toot! Have you blown your horn today?

    In time you will grow to love me. Now rub! Blow the horn if you're still out at this hour! Some of your colleagues are!

    Toot toot!
     
  17. I give you three days


    Max
     
  18. UPS Horn Genie

    UPS Horn Genie Toot toot! Have you blown your horn today?

    Until what? I am forever entombed in my bottle? Rubbing away frantically, gasping for air, desperate to hear the blowing of a package car horn to set me free?!

    Toot toot!
     
  19. cosmo1

    cosmo1 Perhaps. Staff Member

    Keep up the good work, Genie.
     
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  20. No need to quote me on anything. I had you on ignore for a reason.